>>>>>>Hello, once again, my dear readers. Another week, another discussion! I do hope you all have been looking for ways to serve others, no matter how highly you may think of yourself. This week's discussion has to do with caring. Please, read. I spent the whole week thinking about and writing this one.<<<<<<<
Caring about something means everything. A person wishes to be cared for, it means that people appreciate their existence. Any amount of or type of caring will yield positive results. Within a community, caring is what keeps everything together. Now, caring comes in both positive and negative contexts. From gratitude to utter hate even, caring will always be better than not having any feeling towards someone. Unfortunately, "I don't care" is becoming a common phrase. Most unfortunately, some people mean it.
The greatest form of caring is, of course, love. You can love an object, of course, but love of people is more substantial. I can certainly love my computer, bur I receive no love back from it. Even the most advanced artificial intelligence will never feel love, for it contains no living spirit (it is called science FICTION for a reason). So really, loving the inanimate is not really fruitful. Yes, loving another human is the greatest love of all (Those of you who are religious, it is even more substantial to love God, for He always loves everyone). Now, there is no set standard for when love becomes love. Loving even the tiniest bit still contains that bright fire which most warms our hearts. Every person is called to love their friends, their family, and everyone around them. The first two seem easy enough. While you may feel awkward telling a friend you love them, you still feel that way. True friendship is a sign of mutual love. Saying you love your family is only natural. Whether it is your brother, sister, parent, grandparent, cousin, aunt or uncle, love always runs between family members. Therefore, the unloving family is a most sad one.
Now, this last one is the most unusual one. One would be right to say that their neighbor has done great wrong against them, and so deserves no love from said offended person. However, this is where a great amount of humility comes into play (so read my former discussion if you haven't already!). It is so much easier to hold a grudge than to love the one whom the grudge is directed towards. When you are humble enough to say "I will love all even those who offend me," you will have shown the greatest love of all. This "Omni love" is Godly; very few people will ever attain it in their lives. When you have the strength to turn even to someone who has done a great evil to you and truly say you love them, I will bow and try to get you canonized a saint!
Another great form of love is love in marriage. When one looks at a married couple that truly is filled with love for one another, it gives that person a feeling of calm. That love is the best there can be. Out of love for one another, the married couple brings forth children, and in turn loves the fruit of their loving. Marriage is the love that brings forth more love. When parents love their children, it is loving a part of themselves. When you love your child, therefore, you love yourself. What makes the married love even more amazing is that they aren't a part of each other when they meet. The two people meet, "hit it off," and begin a deeper relationship. When you are committed to staying in a relationship for the rest of your life, the truest love possible blooms, for you have taken a person outside yourself and made them a part of your life, your being, and your soul.
The converse must be observed. Hate is a truly dreadful emotion. I have had the displeasure of experiencing it on only one or two occasions, but those were enough. It fills your being with a certain haze, blocking out all good feelings and good will. One can only imagine the anguish that the one who hates without end feels. Always depressed by their displeasure with mankind, they can do nothing but ponder furiously on how to exact vengeance. Some have turned to war to try and settle their hate with another nation, group of people, or even individual. And the worst part about it is that hate breeds more hate! Unfortunately, there are those who take pleasure in their hate. With a strange satisfaction, they watch those they despise, creating more reasons to hate, some of which are unfounded. It is an endless cycle. Most depressing it is, for hate never rests. Love is clearly the better emotion.
Now, what is the worst condition of caring? It is neither love nor hate. Love is all that is good, while hate is nothing but evil. One is much better than the other. Love breeds pleasure, hate breeds violence. SO what is the worst of all, if not one of these two? The worst is the lack of either. When you stop caring for someone or something, you are attempting to cut yourself off from the subject of your displeasure. With a lack of love or hate for the uncared for something or someone, there is no chance for making the relationship better. The worst-case scenario of apathy, for this is what we are speaking of, is suicide. Consider the following poem, "To Santa Claus and Little Sisters." I invite you to read the whole thing carefully:
______________________________________
______________________________________
_________
Once
on yellow paper, with green lines, he wrote a
poem and called it "Chops"
because that was the name of his dog and
that's what it was all about,
and the teacher gave him an "A"
and a gold star
and his mother hung it on the kitchen door and
read it to all his aunts.
That was the year his little sister was born
with tiny toenails and no hair, and Father
Tracey took them to the zoo
and let them sing on the bus,
and his father and mother kissed a lot
and the girl around the corner sent him a
Christmas card signed with a
row of kisses
and his father always tucked him in at night
and he was always there to do it.
Once
on white paper, with blue lines, he wrote
another poem
and he called it "Autumn"
because that was the name of the season
and that's what it was about
and the teacher gave him an "A"
and told him to write more clearly
and his mother didn't hang it on the kitchen
door because the door had
just been painted.
That was the year that his sister got glasses
with black frames and thick lenses
and the kids told him why his mother and
father kissed a lot
and that Father Tracy smoked cigars and left
the butts on the pews
and the girl round the corner laughed when he
went to see Santa Claus
at Woolworths
and his father stopped tucking him in at bed
at night and got mad when he
cried for him to.
Once
on paper torn from his notebook, he wrote
another poem
and he called it "Question Marked Innocence"
because that was the name of his grief and
that's what it was all about
and the professor gave him an "A"
and a strange and steady look
and his mother never hung it in the kitchen
door because he never let her see it.
That was the year he found his sister necking
in the back room
and his parents never kissed or even smiled
and he forgot the end of the Apostles Creed
and Father Tracey
died
and the girl around the corner wore too much
make up
and made him cough
when he kissed her, but he kissed her anyway
Once
at 3am he tucked himself in bed, his father
snoring loudly
he tried another poem on the back of a pack
of matches
and called it absolutely nothing, because that's
what it was all about
and he gave himself an "A"
and a slash on each damp wrist
and hung it on the bathroom door because
he couldn't reach the kitchen.
--Anonymous--
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______________________________________
_________
This poem by an anonymous teenager about a year before his suicide clearly proves the point. What is the trend? What do we see happening as the boy in this poem gets older? Distancing occurs, things are forgotten, people die, and innocence is lost. The mother and father lose interest in each other, and never even smile. The connection that the boy had with his sister declines as she becomes more and more free spirited and rebellious. He disconnects, and even does not care about himself, looking for anything to make him feel wanted. Eventually, when there is nothing he truly cares for anymore, the young man commits suicide, taking his life and future and throwing it into the mysterious unknown of zero possibility. Even if he hated the things around him, he would have tried to make them better and kept on living.
Therefore, I urge two things of you this week. Love all. Loving is the ultimate cure-all. If the whole world loved one another, we would have no troubles. If you find yourself unable to love something, at least keep some sense of feeling for it. Apathy is the worst policy. It leads down a road darker than hate.
>>>>>>Well, that ends number four! This came out later than I wanted, but work was piling up (along with stress) here at college. I hope you enjoyed this, and see you next week!<<<<<<<
bradisonfire
Hey there man, I stumbled upon this post 'cause it was under the 'artist news' section on the front page. I read it, and for the most part, agree with it. About a week ago I posted a blog on MySpace that talks about similar things, so I copied and pasted it here. If you want to check out some of my other blogs, they're on my page, and it's link on my Newgrounds profile.
I was on the phone with Charity for about an hour and a half tonight. I like talking to Charity, because she calls me on my bullshit. Every time. I respect people that do that a lot more than people that don't, mainly because I try to call everyone else on their bullshit, and I like it when someone returns the favor. I also tend to have more 'genius moments' when I'm talking to her than anyone else.
The particular 'genius moment' started off with us talking about the Shakespeare quote "To thine own self be true". True, it's saying you shouldn't lie to yourself, but, can you ever truly lie to yourself? The human mind can't trick itself directly, but rather, one can condition it to response in a predictable way. You can condition yourself to be a victim. You can blame others for your mistakes. It's easy, and it's made easier by the society in which we live.
For example, I started my state mandated alcohol classes last week as a result of my DWI. As we sat down, the instructor asked us each to tell everyone else why we were there. My statement was basically "I fucked up. I had to much to drink, and got behind the wheel, then got pulled over and arrested". The key words are: I. Fucked. Up. A majority of the others told stories of how they were the victims. They were minding their own business, driving home after a long night of debauchery, when suddenly an evil policeman swooped down upon them a wrongfully took them to jail. These were the responses the instructor expected. He gave us a lesson about "Those Sons of Bitches". It's always: Those sons of bitches pulled me over for no reason. I wasn't hurting anyone but they took me to jail just because I was drunk. Those sons of bitches searched my car and found a pipe, and they took me to jail just because of that.
You. Fucked. Up.
We all did, that's why we're in the class.
Driving while intoxicated is illegal. Drunk drivers kill people (thankfully I nor anyone else was hurt). I chose to drink and drive. I fucked up.
Driving with a pipe in the car is illegal. You chose to have it in there anyway. You fucked up.
Being true to yourself means not placing the blame on other people. You should take responsibility for your actions. Everyone should. It's not easy. You have to work at it, probably for your entire life. I am responsible for myself, no one else. It's easy to be led astray by things we see and hear. It's hard to stand up and say "I made a mistake". The key is to not consider them a mistake. They are learning experiences. There has never been a single human being in the entire universe that has never made a mistake. Jesus doesn't count, because most western religions consider him to be the son of God, and I will argue that he wasn't a human being in the traditional sense. The bible says he wasn't conceived by a human being, therefore he wasn't one. But that's a whole different argument. Back to the point.
Anyway, you can't beat yourself up over mistakes. Human have the most complex central nervous system ever known, yet we act like idiots. When a dog makes a mistake, say, he eats something that makes him sick, he learns not to do it again. That wasn't technically a mistake. It was a learning experience. However, it seems that when everyday people encounter learning experiences, they call them mistakes and beat themselves up over them for the rest of their life. We must stop.
To thine own self be true. You are responsible for the mistakes you make, and to are responsible for learning from them.
This leads me to my next point. Loving yourself. Yeah, it's cliched, but you will never love another living creature on this entire earth if you don't first love yourself. We project what we feel for ourselves unto others, whether subconciously or intentionally. If you hate something about yourself, you will hate things about others. Be true to yourself. We all have flaws. Take responsibility for them, and accept them. You are who you are, nothing more, nothing less. It's revolutionary when you accept who you are. Trust me, I know. The more we focus on changing things about ourself that are ingrained in our very souls in the first place, the more complicated life becomes.
There's no such things as a right or wrong way to have a relationship. It's a simple as being honest with ourselves, and accepting who we are, because once you do, you'll (without even realizing it) start being honest with other people and accepting who they are. That's the key to true happiness. It's contagious. You'll automatically attract like-minded people once you start living this way.
Earlier I mentioned my genius moment. Here it is (Chase, pay attention).
Someone places a glass, half filled with water, in front of you. They ask you "is the glass half empty or half full?"
Which one is it?
Here's the genius moment: It's neither. Whoa.
If you say the glass is half empty, you label yourself a pessimist, and an optimist if you say half full.
By labeling yourself either one, you are moving yourself farther away from "To thine own self be true". If you say "I'm a pessimist", here's an example of how a situation will play out:
Say you've met a girl that you really like. You consider trying to take the next step, maybe having a relationship with her. Ah, but you tell yourself "That will never work. I'm -(insert personal flaw here)-." That's pessimism. It will never work. You doom it from the start.
Say you're an optimist, and you meet the same girl. You say "Man, she's really cool. Sure, she has a few flaws, but who doesn't, right?" Then, something like this might happen: You'll start a relationship with her, then, six months down the road, those flaws that seemed so innocent at the start will have become so annoying that you break things off. By pointing out those flaws to yourself, and analyzing them, you have been in fact fertilizing them for six months until they grow into a twisted, terrible, evil thing. It will start haunting you. They will become the only thing you see when you look at her.
Alternatively, you may start having pessimistic thoughts that you mistake as optimism (by not being true to yourself!). You'll think things will get better then a little voice in your head will whisper no it won't.
People say "try to be optimistic". No, don't. Don't try to be anything. Just be true to yourself.
The glass is neither half full nor half empty. It's simply there. It's a glass filled with some water, and that's more than some people in this world have. You should grab the glass, drink it down, and instead of thinking "I'm still thirsty" (pessimism) or "That's good. I bet there's more" (optimism) you should just be thankful to have any water at all, and be thankful that what thirst you had was reduced, no matter by what amount.
That girl I was talking about earlier reduces your thirst by some amount, therefore, rejoice. You're better off than before. Never forget that. Then, if it legitimately doesn't work out, no one made mistakes, and it was simply a learning experience. You learned something about yourself, and surely she did as well.
You should have an attitude of gratitude, and to thine own self be true.
Shinpachi222
Yep, being true to yourself is the most important thing. Honesty is the best policy, yeah? When you ingore things about yourself that are clearly there, they will hurt you in the end. Even if you're humble, don't deny yourself the chance to be human like everyone else. Standing up and syain that you were wrong is hard, and people do, as you said, always make themselves the victim. I hated it when I did that. Going to confession really kicked that out of me. Really, going to confession is great. Not only do you get rid of your sins, but you DO learn to accept yor failures. I enjoyed reading this, maybe I'll use your main topik here for one of my next discussions (don't worry, I'll say you gave me the idea when and if I use it!).